Romance, What Is it and Why Do We Care Anyway?

At first I thought oh jump right in what could it hurt

 You know your best friend is your lover as well as your husband

 Why not start where it all began back there in 1981?

 Are you afraid?

 Well yes in a way because after all the romance is the mystery part the part that starts the whole you and I together part

 The part that starts the entirety of the rest of your two lives

Entwined

Entangled

 Unmanageable

Incorruptible

Unfailing

Ever fragile for an eternity of the "you and the me" that makes one of the both of you

The forever part

All worth the work of ROMANCE

 Besides, how else does one define that phenomenal, hormonal, acing in your feeling when you CATCH the thing?

Being female, I cannot separate romance from love.

Being female, I have to believe that the end result of being romanced will ultimately lead to a relationship and hopefully with the finding of my soul mate

HEY! I AM a 60's kid,,,,what the blank did you expect me to say?

Gloria Steinem aside here a moment and yes I know love is universal and you can find love from all portions of in this vast place we exist

However, I lean a bit toward the more eccentric side

Eccentric in as much as westerners believe at any rate

And opt for the free will theory of the whole why are we here...see we have been together so long now I am not as much I in my writing as I used to be

At any rate, if one takes the westerner approach to the romance thing ....well, watch Sarah Jessica Parker and the rest of the crew on sex  and the city...they all explained every theory out there as far as westerners go male and female, concerning romance

But they still came to the same conclusion!! That sex and love should go together

Well duh, like that took a huge leap of faith eh?

Stupid girls...that is all we are...just stupid girls in the end

If we were more like men, could we go hunt hunt hunt KILL and be done with it?

A different piece of meat every night?

Sorry/getting gross here

Of course not

Neither do men...eventually...around oh about the age of 30 or so the ones who are actually men; and not some lost boy; go looking for what the female as been looking for all her life

Their soul mate, the one they were destined to be with from the start, the one they were meant to stay with throughout eternity. All those lovely aptitudes made immemorial by Nora Roberts.

For myself, I knew from the time I was very small that I was NOT your average bear. I was never going to be a cheerleader or on the high school gymnastic team … Jthe higher power saved that for me in college J,

So when I got out of school and into the nursing world and nearly went crazy and tried to die but didn’t. I left, never to return…ha…famous last words

But I didn’t change my mindset, I still went about looking for my soul mate in all the wrong places…bars, riding a bike down the street blind dates, girlfriends ex’..All that sex in the city stuff that makes NO sense whatsoever!! And just in case, you young uns don’t know this yet…those girlfriends? They don’t stay in your life for the rest of your life either!!

It wasn’t until one day in the fall of 1980, after my Teekee died, that I looked up into that gorgeous Sonoran desert sunrise coming up over the Rincon’s, red streaks to the south, blue already over the bowl of the city, blue like a robin’s egg, and smelled the sunrise itself, so clean and sweet. I finally talked to the higher power instead of yelling…which since 1971 is all I had pretty much been doing /his poor angel/secretary/having to listen to all that mess…never mind, good thing the higher power is like your soul mate eh? Loves us no matter what..Gets mad, sure, but loves us even when the mad is there.

That morning I asked the higher power to please let me meet and stay with (I was still not into the “M” word at that time) forever. And that did it, no more dates, meets, nothing. That Nov 1980 my David came to work at the American Red Cross where I was playing UHHH hardly working UHHHH working HARD!! We looked at each other for a couple of months, we spoke a bit when we went on mobiles together, and we looked a lot.

Then in Jan 1981 I started riding the bus more than riding my bike to work…I’d hang around, let it be heard, uh 'scuse me, KNOWN that I was “Off to the bus stop to catch the number 9 to Grant Road!”

Took just a couple of times too, finally, one day after waving the bus river off and hearing him laugh at me and young lady me and swear next time at Columbus and Grant he just might not stop for me on the WAY INTO work (as if!! He was a dear ole guy and I was one of his favorites)here comes my David around the corner in his grey, 1960 something Chevy truck and stopped, got out, sat down and talked to me a bit  J such a sweetheart, my David, then asked did I want a ride?

My David lived way off in the northwest side of Tucson and I lived in the central…but off we went. After that, we were together. I nearly screwed it all forever that first summer, 1981. He went off to Wyoming to sell the furs as he had been doing for the last three years and I, stupid girl that I am, listened to those ole harpies at AMC and got nervous and wouldn’t answer is calls or his letters (I still have them though and all the silly notes from work that start off with roses are red, violets are blue and end with

Something I do not think I can print on HubPages

But just about six weeks after we had started being two, together, my David gave ,e my first and best and most treasured gift. Is friend, and mine too, Nell Kline, made it for me. A pendant. A brown bear claw with a piece of malachite in it, capped in silver and with a long silver chain to hang just right, not too short, not too long, just right. That poor necklace, and the fact I am now as I was ten, I wore the silver clasp off; twice my David got a silversmith to fix it the first time but we couldn’t find on the last time and he soldered it himself. My David can do anything!

It wasn’t the necklace it wasn’t valentine, it wasn’t the silly notes that made it a romance for us. It was knowing, from the very beginning, that I had asked the higher power and I knew I was ready to find and stay with, my soul mate. Forever

Put simply, my idea of romance, a soul mate, the finding and the keeping of that soul mate; goes like this...

Time is a circle, never ending, no end, no beginning, everything happening all at once, blink of an eye in god speak but interminable to the ones walking around in human (or animal) shells

The point? to learn our lessons

What are those lessons?

Only the individual knows and no one tells the individual, in fact, we really come here with only one thought in our teeny tiny brains

To love the higher power and to love one another/the one lesson that is way too quickly extinguished in so many hearts of so many souls, it is truly a wonder the igher power has any patience left for us t all…

So, where does free will come into all this muck that’s supposed to be about how hubby gave me my brown bear claw with the piece of malachite in it made by Nell Kline way back on our first valentine together in1981?

Lovely aren’t they? Run on sentences...I dont care what the grammar teachers say; sometimes, it is the only mountain path to follow :)

Free will...where does it start? even if you say only when you turn 1-2 years of age and meet the milestone otherwise known as "uh-oh"

Then where does it end? If you guys say "at the time of death" I swear I will scream right here and every Hubber will have to go to the nearest emergency room with hearing difficulties...temporary hearing difficulties...I am not a total .....

Witch! I was gonna say witch! Geez you guys!!!!

So anyway, the higher power says look, I tried, hard, really I did! These four young kids with long hippy type commie pinko hair types in the 20th century came around to watch TV and we were, well, never you mind right now what exactly we were actually doing. Just suffice to say I finally GOT the whole “If you really really love someone," and I do love you guys, flawed, hardheaded heads like cabbages humans that you are, "then you just have to let that loved one go their own way."

But I won’t just throw you guys out there all on your lonesome...well I will but when I get over being so pissed at you I will eventually let everyone in on my get out of jail card free idea. In the meantime, yall get on outta my garden look you’ve gone and messed up my tree dadgumit and I done told yall not to touch that tree now you guys are just outta thar, let the snakes bite yourn heels, see if I care

No, the higher power did not do that...if we were not so stubborn and stupid; we would have figured it out and been enlightened a long time before this

One can hope at any rate

Free will, see, works like time, it’s a circle, no end, no beginning...it just goes and goes. If you know that, then you know you have free will in the home of the higher power as a soul before you say "OK I have to go to school, I have lessons to learn, stupid human school, why can’t it just snow?”Then you turn to your best friend, your soul mate, the reason for you to live, and the one who knows and loves you no matter what

HONEY (smile and cock your pretty aura filled shining light in his face smile in his face) I still have lessons I need to learn, will you please go back with me?"

And your hubby, your sweet strong 'can do anything he sets his mind to do lover' sighs the sigh of the damned and says, “well, OK, but I gotta talk to Fred first, if he and Sandy go back, I'll think about it." Then he pulls you fast flat up against his big belly, you put your arms around him, get a little kiss on the lips and then hubby will say something perverted...and what do you do?

You laugh, what else?