Oh Do You Love Love the Love Bug, the Fly, Not the Movie

Bobbie Gentry was one of only a few country singers who wrote, arranged and sang her own songs. One of her funniest and truest songs is called “Bugs” and parts of the lyrics go like this “Bugs!

Bugs! everywhere you look there's another type of bug

But if ya live in the delta ya got 'em

Here's a sure fire way to pass the time of day

Fold you up a newspaper and swat 'em

Hey look its me with the ddt

Umm hmm umm hmm

Aint they a mess them worrysome pests

Umm hmm umm umm hmm”

Never a truer word was 'spoke' either, for if'n you was to live in the South, from Texas to Georgia and all down to Miami, Florida; you will never escape a bug of some sort. Bugs of all kinds, bugs that are entwined and inseparable. It is of the love bug itself that most Southerners will say are the most troublesome. That is the end of this writer’s use of the vernacular, so doff your Derby and let us talk about this pest, the Love Bug.

Which is really unfair as the first part of its life cycle is actually helpful for the land and life of the South. The female Love Bug lays her few (350 at a time) eggs in decaying leaves and places like your rich compost pile. The eggs hatch into larvae and they eat the decaying soil around them which on turn feed the soil and provide more nutrients for your garden. After the larvae stage they turn into pupal then in less than ten days they hatch into adult flies.

Yes, love Bugs are really a species of a fly. The Love Bug was first seen in Texas in the early ‘20’s and then finally was widespread by 1947 all over the South. There are two cycles of the love bug life. Although the female will live only a maximum of three days, it is during that time that the female will lay many hundreds of eggs in many different places. For example, the beneficence of the honeybee is known for not being able to become resistant to mutation or bacteria. The Honey Bee will not come back to a flower they have drunk from if a Love Bug drinks from it as well.

Although the Love Bug is a fly, it does not eat carrion; it takes its nourishment from nectar, just like the honeybee.

The Love bug appears twice a year, first in the late spring, May through June and then, an interminable time between August and until the temperature in the various portions of the south goes below 68 degrees Fahrenheit during the daytime. Woe betides the summers of Hurricane Weather when the temperature remains above 70 degrees until November. During that time, there are many things the people of the South do to combat the Love Bug. Owners of “Detail Car Wash” shops claim the only way to prevent the acid liquid of the Love Bug from eating the paint off your vehicle is to keep your car waxed on a weekly basis. It is true that the surface of your vehicle can become pitted within hours after the love bug hits the front of your vehicle, however, if you take the time to put $1.25 in the auto car wash daily before you get home that will do as much good as a $75.00 detailing once a week.

Some people even claim that if you apply a liberal amount of baby oil onto the surface of your vehicle every morning then at least the excrement of the Love Bugs the vehicle encounters during the day will come off easier. Doing all of your work, chores, shopping or entertainment when the temperature goes below 68 degrees Fahrenheit is not realistic. There are parts of the South that not only remain well above 68 degrees all summer and into the fall at all times but the humidity can remain well above 80% at the same time. That combination, without the hindrance of the Love Bug is a place that most people would rather not be at any time.

Why then, is the Love Bug still in existence in such a large area of the United States? There are some natural enemies of the Love Bug, such as the Robin and the Quail. There are some insects also that eat the mature flies such as the centipede; however, there is so far no insecticide that can control their numbers. The love bugs swarm by the thousands and can be seen from a long distance. If you travel along I-10 East into Florida or North on I-65 to Birmingham, Alabama, your vehicle will be the smoking gun, so to speak, of many thousands of Love Bugs demise. Never fear that your vehicle will be arrested for vehicular homicide.

In fact, in the South, an award is granted to every person who purchases a white car for the Love Bug is most attracted to light colors, from white material, to white paint, to white wood. Truly, the only thing more sought after than the regular and systematic destruction of this fly is its smell. Acidic does not come close to describing the truly foul stench of a dead Love Bug. The highest award and a lifelong supply of DDT (dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane; and still available for sale at your local feed store in Baldwin County) awaits the lucky Southerner who can eliminate the smell of a dead Love Bug from any surface, up to and not excluding the human nostril! Ah, our well-known Love Bug, otherwise known as Plecia nearctica, where is your passport and please, allow us to validate your parking ticket. You have overstayed your welcome by five score and eleven years, it is time you returned home, do you not agree?

And it is not true that DDT can be found for sale anywhere in the South...We give it away at holidays like the famous revolving gift, fruitcake :)

Now you guys know I'm just kiddin bout the feed store part, right?